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<add>the</add> heart to him. He that alone knows
the secrets of every heart, taught me
by degrees to see into my own no-
-thingness & to discover the deep
corruption & depravity of my heart
by nature, & that unless I had his
holy Spirit to direct me, I should
remain unstable & fluctuating as
the water. _ Feeling this to be my
case, & being sensible how wa=
-vering I was, I thought sometimes
that it would be in vain to give
myself much trouble, & that if
I was to be saved, I should, & if not
that all my endeavours to attain sal-
vation  would be fruitless. _ Mentioning
once these thoughts to a Sister, she
replied, that she was very sorry
to hear this from me; I told her,
that it was my firm belief. She
then said, that she hoped our Sa-
vior would convince me of my
error before it was too late. From 
that time forward my ideas con=
-cerning the means of salvation
became quite different & I was brought
to believe that if I was not saved,
the fault would be entirely my own.