.300009.4000094

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-its as a fit of undeserved grace. I
begged him to preserve me in this frame
of spirit, and to grant me low thoughts
of myself at all times, seeing that to
poor needy sinners he was so gracious.
In this disposition my days passed
happily away, until my innate de-
pravity began to awaken within me.
Hitherto I had often acknowledged
myself a sinful creature, but now
I felt that from the heart proceed
wil thoughts, and sorely was I tor-
mented with un-christianlike
thoughts, so that I had no rest day
nor night. To disclose my trouble to
others, would I thought inevitably
deprive me of their good opinion;
my confidence in my Saviour also
vanished, and I knew not how to
bear myself for distress of mind. In
this pitiable condition, I shut my-
self up in a room alone - it was a
sacrament-day <date>Dec 24 1785</date>, threw
myself at my Saviour's feet and
                                            begged