Moravian Lives

13.
heart! Who can know it? In October the
same year, I was favor'd to be spectator
at the Holy Communion, which filled me
with gratitude and praise. The moments I
spent beholding the Congregation partake of
their divine repast, were some of the happi=
=est in my whole life, I will not attempt to
describe what I enjoyed; Suffice it to say, it
was inexpressible delight, such as has seldom
fallen to my lot here below; nor perhaps
would it have been the best for me. for
through human weakness, even this proved
the occasion of some perplexity. When I became 
a Candidate for the Holy Communion on Good-
=Friday 1785. I was led to expect the same
degree of enjoyment as before, but was not
so favor'd, at which I felt disappointed.
To be a partaker of the Lord's body and blood
sacramentally appeared very important to me, 
and I felt unworthy of such a privilege. My
views, at this time, were certainly too legal,
and I formed erroneous ideas respecting the prop=
=er state of heart, in which we should draw
nigh to the Table of the Lord. On the 17th.
of April, after previous confirmation, I par=
=took of the Lords Supper, with the Congregati=
=on the first time. But instead of that sanc=
=tity and holiness which I thought indispen=
=sable for every communicant to enjoy at