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in John Church

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to encounter, but I firmly believe they would
not have been so hard upon me, had I
been more humble & childlike. For these
& many other faults, I could only cast my-
self down as a sinner at the throne of grace,
where I always met with a compassionate
Saviour. Thus far I had written when I
was confined by a severe illness, in 1789,
during which I experienced much of the bles-
sings of those words "that in all our afflic-
tions, He is afflicted, " & had grace given me
to be quite resigned to our Lord's will ei-
ther to live or die; but had the choice been
left to me I would have said with Paul:
"To me to live is Christ, but to die is gain";
for indeed I felt t a desire to depart & to
be with him
whom I could love above
all things. However it pleased our dear
Lord to restore me, & the following year
to give me a call to serve him as Congn
Labourer at Tytherton in Wiltshire. I finish-
ed my labours in Gracehill with sensa-
tions of shame & love.
Shame because I
was led from time to time to discern
spots in myself, which I had heretofore
overlooked, which though I was thank-
ful for such discoveries frequently
 

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