Moravian Lives

what it was that moved Me to it, and it was the Words
of Christ, John 6.053, Where He says, Verily, verily, I 
say unto You, if he eat not the Flesh of the Son of Man,
and drink his Blood, ye have no Life in You.
In the Year 17246 when I began with the Custom
of catechizing and answering with Scripture Texts, as
is usual in the reformd Church; I could give no Answer,
my Heart was shut up, oppressd and dejected, especially,
when the Point of God's Election was healed of, as it
is written, Jacob have I loved, and Esau have I hated.
O how distressd was my Soul! I had hard Thoughts of
God, and would flee from Him: I thot. it is possible
that the Lord hates Me too, because I am a Sinner.
Another Time I had a great Strife within my Self,
I thot. if Christ died only for Believers, how do I know
that I am a Believer; then came to my Mind, what
my Grandmother used to say unto me of Free Grace and
that when We were without Strength, Christ died for
the Ungodly, and that Jesus atoned for the Sins of
the whole World by his Death on the Cross. O thought
I, if I had seen Jesus in the Cross Flesh, I would have washd his

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O Jesu! hadst Thou not sought for Me, and followd ever,
I had not sought for Thee, nor found Thee, never.
In the 36th. Year of my Age, I had yet a darkend Under-
-standing, thro' the Ignorance and Blindness of my Heart.
In this Year, the Lord took my Husband, my best Friend
from Me, and I believe that He is happily gone into
Rest, after a consumptive Illness of 5 Years and a Half;
and much Suffering both of Soul and Body; 14 Days be-
-fore his Departure, He said to Me, that his Time was
short, and desired to make his Peace with the Lord, who
graciously gave him to feel his undone Condition, He
prayd heartily for Grace, and the Forgiveness of his Sins,
and the Lord heard Him and gave him a thirsting Desire
that He said, O how I thirst for Redemption. The 25
of April, He fell on Sleep in the 39th. Year of his Age
after We had been married together 13 Years and a Half, &
having made Provision for his Family, Me and my two
Children, and recommended Us to the Grace of God, in
a hearty Confidence of Gods Mercy towards Us. He
said to Me, God will bless you and your Children. he
gave me his Advice how I should act in Case the Children