Moravian Lives

of God. This caus'd me great Concern. I pray'd and Sigh Shew me
thy ways O Lord that I may walth  walkth in thy Truth! He answerd me I will
direct thee and shew the way thou shalt go, I will guide thee with my
Eyes. About this time there was a great awakning at Oderwitz which
I would fain have joind, but at first, fear of Man gave me much
trouble, yet I was convinced in my heart that I should find what
I sought. I went to Berthrelsdorff and heard Pastor Rothe preach
|:which I had done once before:| and in his Sermon he gave me
such a plain description of my State of Soul as tho I had before
told him of it. And now the perscecution  persecution began which did not
terrify me, I felt peculiar Grace in my heart, and had I remaind
in my Simplicity, I should have avoided many a heavy hour
But instead of that I came into self Workings, I went to the Parson
and told him my whole State he often told me I was in the right
way I should only pray to God to bring me further in his Grace 
but no sooner did he see that I conversed with souls who were
convinced how wrong their former Life had been then he indea-
=vourd to hinder me all he could. The Meetings at Oderwitz
was forbidden, and a great Number was Arrested and taken to
Zittau. As I was much concern'd about these people I went a
few days after to enquire wether  whether they were set at Liberty or
not. Just as I came to Gottlieb Webers House 2 Men laid
hold of me and would carry me before a Justice, not knowing
for what cause, I refused to comply, they broke their Sticks
over my head and so evil intreated me that I fell to the Earth
without Sensce  Sense or Motion, a Number of People being gatherd the
Men made off, as soon as I came to myself my first thought
was:Lord forgive them. I went home and felt very happy
The Next day I could scarce hold up my Head for Pain. I now
keept  kept quiet at home and only went now and then to Church
some time after the Lord of the Place sent an Officer to bring me
before him and ask'd me, wether  whether I acknowledged the Articles
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at Zittau against The Clergy. I could not then do otherwise
but Answer Yes. Hereupon he committed me to Prison. I was
quite alone there, and was often ask'd if I would not change my
Mind, but I could not. The Justice tried the Serpents Wisdom and
told me I should only Ask Pardon and all would be well. I was in a 
great Strait yet promised to do so. An Officer brought me then to
the Parson to Ask his Pardon. I thought with my tongue I will do
it, but my Heart shall not give its Consent. But no sooner had
the Words pass'd my Lips then my Distress was greater than I can
Express. I begd and pray'd Oh dearest Saviour! do not cast me off
forever. I went to the Parson and told him how I felt since my
Rescinding, that the blessed Application of Jesus Merrits and death
to my heart, was now quite gone and Vanish'd He tried to make
me easy by saying It would be all well again in a short time
soon After Notice was given me by An Officer sent from the
Lord of the Place, That I should in a short time leave the Town
I went to Herrnhuth and found there an Habbitation  Habitation. In August
1728 I moved thither with my Family altho with a Wounded and
grieved Heart, and went on in my Misery and Distress above
3 Years, and then My heart was Softened and Melted thro the
Love and Grace of the faithfull  faithful Friend of Sinners so that I
had some hopes of Comfort. One Morning when I took my
little Anna Rosina out of Bed I ask'd her what Verse she would
give me, and she repeated such a Sweet Comfortable one
that my Heart was enlarged so that I could lay myself as a poor
lost Sinner at the Feet of Jesus and find all the Blame in me
then I found enough cause to be a Sinner and obtained an insight
into the bleeding and Sacrifice of Jesus in which alone I could obtain
Grace Mercy and forgiveness of Sins. Soon after the dear Disciple
sent for me and ask'd me wether  whether I was willing to be in a Band
which Br. Tobias Friedrick keept  kept? This I look'd upon as a great
                                                                                                Favour